“I remember leaving the office and thinking, ‘That was not great.'”
When Taylor Nitti, a mother of four from Minnesota, brought her children along to a quick dental cleaning, she expected a routine visit, not a letter that would ignite a parenting debate across the internet.
In a TikTok video that has drawn thousands of reactions, Nitti, 32, said it’s common for her to take her kids — ages 7, 5, 4 and 3 — along to appointments, since it fits her family’s schedule and allows her to keep evenings free with her husband. As she recorded the video, the sounds of her kids playing could be heard in the background.
That day at the dentist, though, the Nitti household’s youngest members were unusually energetic, squabbling the moment they entered the waiting room. It was, as Nitti put it in an interview with TODAY.com, “one of those days.”
“They were bickering over who was holding the magazine, just little sibling stuff,” Nitti recalls. When the hygienist called her back, she handed her children her phone, hoping they’d settle in with a show. Instead, new arguments broke out over who got to hold it and who could see the screen.
“I remember leaving the office and thinking, ‘That was not great,’” she says. About a week later, a politely-worded letter arrived from the dentist’s office, asking that she not bring her kids to future visits. Nitti shared the letter in the TikTok that would soon go viral.
“We understand that it can be challenging to arrange childcare, and we appreciate that you bring your children when needed,” it read, in part. “However, we’ve noticed that during some recent visits, the noise and activity in the reception and treatment areas have made it difficult for our team to provide the best care, not only for you, but also for other patients who may be feeling anxious or undergoing procedures that require quiet concentration.”
“They were bickering over who was holding the magazine, just little sibling stuff,” Nitti recalls. When the hygienist called her back, she handed her children her phone, hoping they’d settle in with a show. Instead, new arguments broke out over who got to hold it and who could see the screen.
“I remember leaving the office and thinking, ‘That was not great,’” she says. About a week later, a politely-worded letter arrived from the dentist’s office, asking that she not bring her kids to future visits. Nitti shared the letter in the TikTok that would soon go viral.
“We understand that it can be challenging to arrange childcare, and we appreciate that you bring your children when needed,” it read, in part. “However, we’ve noticed that during some recent visits, the noise and activity in the reception and treatment areas have made it difficult for our team to provide the best care, not only for you, but also for other patients who may be feeling anxious or undergoing procedures that require quiet concentration.”
Nitti didn’t bristle at the letter. She understood it. “I think their reasons are valid,” she said in the video. But for a mother already questioning herself, it landed hard: “I literally wanted to cry.”
Still feeling “extremely embarrassed,” Nitti told viewers she doesn’t plan to return and will look for a new provider instead.
Her explanation didn’t shield her from criticism. The notion of wrangling four children under 8 at a dental appointment seemed outrageous to many, and they said so, loudly, in the comments.
- “If I was getting a root canal and heard all that noise I would lose it. And I have four kids.”
- “Imagine having a husband and you can’t go to the dentist without your kids.”
- “I work in a dental office. We have a couple moms that do this. Kids running up and down our halls, jumping and knocking into the walls in the waiting room, walking into peoples offices . It really is too much. I’m sorry.”
- “OK but you seem to be missing the point if your solution is to go to another dentist. that other dentist doesn’t want a bunch of kids in their waiting room either. the better solution is have your husband watch his children twice a year.”
- “This comment section is awful. She is taking accountability, she doesn’t disagree, she says she’s embarrassed but doesn’t blame them. She is respectful toward the dentist office and their decision. She says she’s working on her parenting and feeling low and everyone decides to PILE ON a struggling mother.”
While Nitti will still be finding a new dentist, she will not be bringing her four kids. “Definitely not,” she tells TODAY. “I would not want to put myself or others back in that situation where a letter would need to be sent or I felt like a crappy parent.”
